Monty Python’s Four (revised) Yorkshiremen

Four well-dressed men google-hanging-out each connected to each other and the rest of the world via their choice of mobile technology.

1st Man: Ahh.. Very passable, that, very passable.

2nd Man: Nothing like the new I phone 5 ?

3rd Man: You’re right there Jacob.

4th Man: Who’d a thought thirty years ago we’d all be sittin’ here talking, texting and googling on a phone with no wires

1st Man: Aye. In them days, we’d a’ been glad to have a phone.

2nd Man: A working phone.

4th Man: with one of those turn dials.

3rd Man: OR ask the operator!

1st Man: If the lines weren’t busy.

4th Man: We never used to have a phone. We used to use two cups and a string.

2nd Man: The best WE could manage was Doris the old pigeon.

3rd Man: But you know, we were happy in those days, though we had no technology.

1st Man: Aye. BECAUSE we had no technology. My old Dad used to say to me, “facebook doesn’t buy you friends.”

4th Man: ‘E was right. I had friends then and I had NO laptop. All we had was a Sega megadrive with 16bits and a game of Donkey Kong and Pacman.

2nd Man: 16 bits? You were lucky to have a Sega! We used to play on this old Atari with Pong and joysticks and we were happy.

3rd Man: You were lucky to have a console! We used to have a pinball machine in the youth club!

1st Man: Ohhhh we used to DREAM of a pinball machine in youth club! Woulda’ been a holiday to us. We used to play cowboys and indians in the woods behind our house.

4th Man: Well when I say “pinball” it was only a hole in the wall and an old golfball, but it was pinball to US.

2nd Man: We were evicted from our youth club and had to watch telly through the neighbours window!

3rd Man: You were lucky your neighbours had a telly! There were a hundred and sixty of us crowded around a radio listening to children’s hour.

1st Man: Radio?

3rd Man: Aye.

1st Man: You were lucky. We had to get our information from books. We used to have to get up at six o’clock in the morning, go to the library, check out a book and read it, with no search facility, before handwriting assignments in cursive script. When we got home, our Dad would read us news from the newspaper – real paper!

2nd Man: Luxury. We used to have to get up at three o’clock in the morning, recite poems by heart, do maths with our fingers, learn logarithms, come home, and Dad would beat us around the head and neck with a broken bottle, if we were LUCKY!

4th Man: Right. I had to get up in the morning at ten o’clock at night, half an hour before I went to bed, eat a lump of cold poison, spend twenty-nine hours a day searching classrooms for a scrap of knowledge, and pay the teacher for permission to come to school, and when we got home, our Dad would kill us, and dance about on our graves singing “Hallelujah.”

1st man: But you try and tell the young people today that… and they won’t believe ya’.

ALL: Nope, nope..

If this only entertains me, it has been worth doing.

9 Comments

on “Monty Python’s Four (revised) Yorkshiremen
9 Comments on “Monty Python’s Four (revised) Yorkshiremen
  1. Reminds me of the Facebook posts I sometimes see that feature “technology” from the 1980s and older, sometimes with the caption of being so old that I remember dialing a rotary telephone. Even as clunky as some of these devices were, advances such as the tethered remote for a TV paved the way for some of the modern conveniences we take for granted today. How will the tablets, cell phones, the LCD TVs we have today evolve in the future, offering more power and capabilities for the next generation? What will today’s kids say to their youngsters when reminiscing about the technology they grew up with and with which they felt so familiar?

  2. LOL….OK that is just plan awesome. Next tast: find 3 other teachers and using Hangout On Air (that records the hangout to YouTube) do this! That would be awesome!!!!!!

    There’s your challenge now to find 3 other willing participants!

    • I am on the case – not sure the yorkshire accents will be up to it but would like to try out Hangout On Air. I have roped in my husband – now on the lookout for 2 other people who owe me something!!

  3. OK, I think I owe you something. Not sure you’d want such an acting newbie (though I’ve watched you coach those grade 9 forensics wannabes), but I have loved this sketch for many years, am in awe of your emulation, and would have fun helping out. I would certainly need some voice coaching. I can hear it in my head, but not sure I can make it come out of my mouth.

    Of course, another thing that struck me is the irony of some of your hardships: playing imaginative games in the woods behind our house, reciting poems by heart (which my dad actually did make us do), making a phone with two cups and a string. These are wonderful childhood experiences. Are we losing these types of experiences because of the development of technology? Do kids find time for both? Am I just nostalgic because you’re describing the things I did as a child?

    • I wonder this myself, but am reluctant to write this in a blog for fear of being labeled a Luddite. I know there are virtual instruments an online choirs, or record your own musical genius to youtube (go Justin Bieber) but what of sitting near others and actually singing or playing your instrument and feeling the music surround you….

  4. That is my favourite Monty Python sketch and your revised version had me laughing so hard that my stomach hurt! Id love to Hangout On Air with you… I dont think I can it without cracking up though.

  5. What is a telly? 🙂

    Love it! I don’t have a British accent, but I can smoke a cigar! I am game if you need me to help educate the youth of the world!

    • Do Americans seriously never use the expression telly? Everyday I am amazed by the atlantic divide! This is cultural diversity at its best. If I can’t get real yorkshire accents you are in!

  6. Ahh Monty Python and one-up-manship. They say it so well, even with English humour. I’m glad time moves on otherwise we would have the inspiration for such works as this. Making comparisons with by-gone days only makes me stand in awe of where our journey with technology has come from and in wonder of the endless possibilities ahead.

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